Evolutionary Narcosis

After it all, I wound up more human than most, but without a soul. It's a hard realisation that to become more human you have to sacrifice the only thing that ever made you human. It's that bend in the road no one sees until after they're over the cliff, you've barely even had time to register the realisation before you've started screaming. Once, that screaming would have been a distress signal, but in this age of animatronic responses it only gets a curious glance. Sometimes I wonder if things would be better if I'd followed the rest, and hadn't thrown it all away for a chance at something more. Getting something more, of course, is completely relative. I should have been more specific in what I wanted more of, because instead of getting more humanity, I only got more than I wanted - and everything else taken away. Now my emotions are only higher-process thoughts, calculation what I should be feeling. True emotions were detached, leaving only a sample of my soul to rot inside this shell, watching the world go by through eyes that seem more like video screens than windows. My only regret, is that there is no turning back.